One Day at a Time —The Secret For Reality
The idea of “One Day at a Time”
was new to me. I always had to protect myself from past harms and was very
focused on how to be safe. I did not know that I was reliving the past
repeatedly and reacting to those old situations. As I worked through the
principles presented in my first columns, I was able to leave my history
behind, one fear at a time. In addition, I could release my resentments, as I
was no longer the little 5 year old throwing a temper tantrum that life did not
go my way.
As I let go of my past negative
thoughts and actions that had been recreating my going around on the hamster
wheel, I could now move off the old rotation and into the present time. This
frees me not to carry the burdens of the earlier experiences. My head can clear
of those messages that kept me reacting as if I was still in the old
predicaments.
The emotional damage from
punishment was severely ingrained for not getting the chores done as directed.
I was beaten, humiliated, and shamed for not measuring up to my stepfather’s
standards and requirements. Therefore, I acted in extremes to be perfect to
escape his chastisement. However, there was always another predicament and
price to pay. This kept me a victim and always vigilant trying to stay safe. It
felt like I was always in a war zone. Focusing on the past for me was about
survival.
At the same time, I had a huge
worry about the future, especially, my financial security. My fear of not
having money began at the age of three. My mother and real father fought every
night, and I felt abandoned and without any security in my life. How would I
get money for food? If they were not there for me, how would I eat? This fear followed
me throughout my life until recently.
My mother was raised in the Great
Depression in the United States. She taught me the fear of financial insecurity
well. I was to keep my meager amount of money from birthday gifts in the bank
until a rainy day. I kept track of every penny I had or spent. That was the
rule. I never had an allowance to blow on myself. If I did not buy a souvenir
on a vacation, that was considered a good choice. Even in my marriage, I wrote
down every penny spent for the family. To spend money on me meant I might not
have the food I would need in my future.
Therefore, coming to terms that
they were sick people and I do not have to follow their demands anymore became
freeing. It became essential to release the past and the future so I could live
in the NOW—One Day at a Time. In my earlier years, I was never in reality.
Accepting that the past cannot be redone, improved, or changed. I can replace
the old messages and fire those voices in my head. I can make my own rules and
give myself approval for my actions. This meant moving beyond my childish
endurance. I cannot pray for a better past. It is over.
The past was a fantasy that no
longer existed. My worries about the future were unrealistic hope or figments
of my imagination. I so much wanted to have everyone get along and treat me
decently. My prayers for a happy family were not going to happen. That daydream
never came true. I have to create my happiness and not depend on them to make
me happy or provide my needs.
Living in the present time is a
novel idea. Reality is in the moment to moment. Life is only right now. I have
a roof over my head, food for the next meal, a car to get me to my activities.
How I handle my life right now builds my future. If I offer loving help, listen
to someone, or do a kindness for someone, it will come back to me. When I drive
a friend to the grocery store or contribute my time or money to a good cause, I
am creating my potential.
As an adult, I see where I can
contribute to others. Instead of a love taker, I became a love giver. My future
becomes caring, kindness, and being helpful. I build my own future by how I
respond in love now. What I give away returns as abundance.
Now, it is possible to make good
choices. I no longer react from the past and am acting in loving ways. I make
amends where it is appropriate to right my side of the street and trust the
universe to give me direction and guidance for my life. The ego is no longer
running my show, I am.
I just do the next right
indicated thing as I move through the day. This is the secret for being in
reality. Now I can be fully engaged in what is happening around me: the sights,
smells, sounds, the people, things, and the ideas that occur. When I learn to
value each day, using it wisely, and fully, I need not react when it ebbs into
yesterdays, nor waste it by projecting my thoughts into tomorrows.
Living one day at a time allows
me to brush away my previous days, to let go of my dread of tomorrow, and get
on with my life, now. I seize today, put it in order, and fully make it my
own. I take time to stop and smell the roses, and take my life One Day at
a Time. I am happy in reality.
Today I Will:
1. Slow down
2. Enjoy the flowers
3. Be kind to others and myself
4. Remember everything is OK.
5. Reduce my expectations
6. Increase my laughter
7. Be less sensitive
8. Hug my lover
9. Not over react
10. Meet all events with confidence
11. Release the past
12. Enjoy the quality of life’s
journey
I share my experience and
strength hoping t it will enrich your life.
Web site
is Angelicasgifts.com
Blog
is marilynredmondbooks.blogspot.com
Lectures, interviews, and
spiritual information on You Tube at
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